Saturday, September 26, 2009

Too much breathing.

I've always had a problem with managing stress. Even in high school, when the work load wasn't so intense, I would have bouts of hyperventilation. Of course back then I didn't know I was hyperventilating. I would just suffer from a constant feeling of breathlessness, and ridiculous tight pain in my chest. I remember going to the doctor, who told me I was just stressed. She didn't offer any solutions to my problem.

Now, with the beginning of another school year, my anxiety problems seem to be worsening. No matter how in control I feel, or how relaxed I may think I am, I find myself struggling to breathe. Frankly it's frustrating, and trying to stop the cycle of overbreathing is painful and almost scary. When I overbreathe I ironically feel like I'm not breathing enough, so I breathe even more, which makes things worse. They say to stop this cycle, I have to breathe less and exhale more. Now, you can imagine how hard this is when you already feel as though you're suffocating.

I don't know what good they will do for me, but I think I will go see an advisor about it now. I've been trying to go to the gym. Today I worked out for two hours, and still I'm here, breathing painfully.

I need to learn to deal.

I just finished watching parts 1 and 2 of the mini-series, "The House of Saddam." My heart breaks for the people of Iraq, who've had nothing but pain and bad luck strewn upon them throughout the decades, by greedy, delusional leaders who care only for their own "pride."


penguinone said...

I know that feeling quite well myself. I used to feel like I didn't get enough air at really, really random times. I'm still unsure of whether it's hyperventilation or me just being paranoid.. that's the answer I got from my mom whnever I told her I could not breathe lol. I hear yoga helps a lot... but ironically, I don't like the deep breathing you have to do in Yoga. I don't have the patience... haha. I should develop some.